https://harleytanner.com/field-notes Straight talk on dating after divorce for executive men. No fluff, no games, no excuses. en-us Thu, 12 Nov 2026 21:25:21 GMT https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-talk-to-your-wife-without-arguing https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-talk-to-your-wife-without-arguing Tue, 10 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT Most marital arguments are lost in the first thirty seconds. Here is how to open, what to do with your hands, and when to stop talking. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-much-to-say-about-your-ex https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-much-to-say-about-your-ex Sat, 07 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT She will ask about your marriage. Your answer tells her more about your future than your past. Here is how to handle it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-your-wife-repeats-herself https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-your-wife-repeats-herself Sat, 07 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT What you hear as nagging is usually a request that did not land the first four times. Here is the difference, and how to make it stop for good. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/when-and-how-to-introduce-her-to-your-kids https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/when-and-how-to-introduce-her-to-your-kids Wed, 04 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT Introduce her too early and you destabilize the kids. Too late and you stall the relationship. Here is how to time it and handle it right. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-does-my-wife-resent-me https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-does-my-wife-resent-me Wed, 04 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT Resentment is not built out of one big thing. It is built out of a hundred small unacknowledged ones. Here is where it comes from and how to drain it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-when-your-kids-live-with-you https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-when-your-kids-live-with-you Sun, 01 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT A full house and a real dating life sound like a contradiction. They are not. Here is how to run both without shortchanging either. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/the-bedroom-is-the-symptom-not-the-problem https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/the-bedroom-is-the-symptom-not-the-problem Sun, 01 Nov 2026 12:00:00 GMT Physical closeness is the last thing to go in a marriage and the last to come back. It follows the closeness you build in the ordinary hours, not the other way around. Here is what actually brings it back, and why pushing on it backfires. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-date-ideas-beyond-dinner-and-a-movie https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-date-ideas-beyond-dinner-and-a-movie Thu, 29 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT Dinner and a movie is an interview across a table with no way to escape. Here is how to plan a first date that actually lets you two connect. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/married-but-lonely https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/married-but-lonely Thu, 29 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT You can be lonely in a house with someone in it. Here is why married loneliness happens to men who did nothing wrong, and the first move out of it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-the-second-date-is-where-men-blow-it https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-the-second-date-is-where-men-blow-it Mon, 26 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT The first date went great, so you coast, and the second one dies. Here is why the second date is the real test and how to pass it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-your-marriage-feels-like-roommates https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-your-marriage-feels-like-roommates Mon, 26 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT A roommate marriage is not a broken marriage. It is a marriage on autopilot. Here is how the drift happens, how to spot it, and the first move back. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-husbands-stop-pursuing-their-wives https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/why-husbands-stop-pursuing-their-wives Sat, 24 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT Nobody decides to stop pursuing. It gets retired after the wedding, one small surrender at a time. Here is how to put the chase back without faking it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-to-do-when-she-goes-quiet https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-to-do-when-she-goes-quiet Fri, 23 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT The replies slow down and your mind writes the worst ending. Here is how to read a quiet stretch and respond like a man, not a worried kid. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-your-wife-feels-in-a-roommate-marriage https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-your-wife-feels-in-a-roommate-marriage Thu, 22 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT You feel the distance. So does she, and usually sooner. Here is an honest read on the drift from her side, and why it changes your next move. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-text-like-a-grown-man-dating https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-text-like-a-grown-man-dating Tue, 20 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT Texting is where good momentum goes to die. Here is how to use it to build a real date instead of a pen-pal situation. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/things-you-stopped-saying-to-your-wife https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/things-you-stopped-saying-to-your-wife Tue, 20 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT Roommate marriages are built out of silence. The gratitude that dried up, the apology you owe, the question never asked. Here is how to break the quiet. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-lead-your-marriage https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-lead-your-marriage Mon, 19 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT Leading your marriage is not being in charge of your wife. It means carrying your share on purpose and being a man worth following. Here is the difference. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/give-your-wife-your-attention-back https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/give-your-wife-your-attention-back Sun, 18 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT Your best attention got reassigned to the job, the phone, and the kids. She gets what is left. Here is how to put presence back, starting tonight. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-90-days-after-your-divorce-is-final https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-90-days-after-your-divorce-is-final Sat, 17 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT The three months after the papers sign decide the next three years. Here is how to spend them so you rebuild instead of relapse. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/fix-a-roommate-marriage-without-counseling https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/fix-a-roommate-marriage-without-counseling Sat, 17 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT You do not need a therapist to end a roommate marriage. You need a plan you can run solo. Here is how, and when counseling really is the right call. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/30-day-plan-to-end-a-roommate-marriage https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/30-day-plan-to-end-a-roommate-marriage Fri, 16 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT One small mission a day for thirty days, then review, recommit and run it again. Here is how the plan works and why small beats grand. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/when-to-have-the-exclusive-talk-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/when-to-have-the-exclusive-talk-after-divorce Wed, 14 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT Dating more than one person is not dishonest until you have agreed not to. Here is when and how to have the exclusivity talk like a grown man. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-after-a-30-year-marriage https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-after-a-30-year-marriage Mon, 12 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT Thirty years married and suddenly single is a specific kind of disorienting. Here is how to date again when the world changed while you were loyal. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-vet-the-right-woman-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-vet-the-right-woman-after-divorce Fri, 09 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT You would never make a major hire on a good interview alone. Here is how to vet a partner before you hand her the next thirty years. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-know-shes-the-one-to-keep https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-know-shes-the-one-to-keep Wed, 07 Oct 2026 11:00:00 GMT Not the fireworks question. The real one. Here is how to tell the difference between a woman you are excited about and the one to build a life with. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-women-over-50-want-in-a-man https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-women-over-50-want-in-a-man Mon, 05 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT It is not your bank account or your abs. Here is what accomplished women are actually looking for, from a coach who asks them. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-meet-women-in-your-50s-without-apps https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-meet-women-in-your-50s-without-apps Fri, 02 Oct 2026 12:00:00 GMT The apps are one channel, not the only one. Here is how to meet the right women through your actual life, on purpose. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/rebuilding-confidence-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/rebuilding-confidence-after-divorce Wed, 30 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Confidence is not a feeling you wait for. It is built from kept promises. Here is how to rebuild yours after a divorce took it apart. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-stop-comparing-every-woman-to-your-ex https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-stop-comparing-every-woman-to-your-ex Mon, 28 Sep 2026 11:00:00 GMT If every date gets measured against your marriage, you are dating a ghost. Here is how to meet the woman in front of you as she actually is. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/building-a-life-worth-joining https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/building-a-life-worth-joining Sun, 27 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Stop trying to find the right woman to complete your life. Build a life so good the right woman wants in. Here is how. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-tell-when-youre-the-problem-and-fix-it https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-tell-when-youre-the-problem-and-fix-it Sat, 26 Sep 2026 15:50:24 GMT If the same issue keeps showing up across different women, the common denominator is you. Here is how to find your part and change it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/red-flags-when-dating-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/red-flags-when-dating-after-divorce Fri, 25 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Loneliness makes men ignore the obvious. Here are the red flags worth walking away from, and the green flags worth slowing down for. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-spot-a-woman-still-fighting-her-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-spot-a-woman-still-fighting-her-divorce Thu, 24 Sep 2026 11:00:00 GMT You held yourself to a standard of being ready. Hold her to it too. Here is how to tell if she is present or still at war with her past. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-write-a-dating-profile-for-men-over-50 https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-write-a-dating-profile-for-men-over-50 Wed, 23 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Your profile does the work before you say a word. Here is how to write one that reads like a full life, not a resignation letter. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-two-divorces-actually-teach-you https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/what-two-divorces-actually-teach-you Tue, 22 Sep 2026 20:00:13 GMT I have been divorced twice. Not a credential I wanted, but it taught me the process that finally worked. Here is what it cost me to learn. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-know-youre-ready-to-date-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-know-youre-ready-to-date-after-divorce Mon, 21 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Readiness is not a feeling or a date on the calendar. It is a test you can actually pass. Here are the two questions that settle it. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-apps-for-men-over-50 https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-apps-for-men-over-50 Fri, 18 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT The apps work better than you fear and worse than they advertise. Here is how to use them like a man with a full life, not a rookie. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-dating-again https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-dating-again Thu, 17 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT Your kids get a voice, not a veto. Here is how to tell them you are dating again without blowing up the peace. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-date-conversation-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/first-date-conversation-after-divorce Wed, 16 Sep 2026 13:29:29 GMT The first date is not an interview and not a therapy session. Here is exactly what to say, what to skip, and what to listen for. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-handle-rejection-dating-after-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-handle-rejection-dating-after-divorce Tue, 15 Sep 2026 14:00:00 GMT Rejection is a toll, not a verdict. Here is how to take it like a squared-away man and keep it from running your dating life. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-date-again-after-a-gray-divorce https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/how-to-date-again-after-a-gray-divorce Mon, 14 Sep 2026 12:00:00 GMT A gray divorce ends one life and hands you a blank page. Here is how to date again on purpose, from a coach who did it after two. https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-after-divorce-for-men-over-50 https://harleytanner.com/field-notes/dating-after-divorce-for-men-over-50 Sun, 13 Sep 2026 01:34:24 GMT Starting over after decades married is a skills gap, not a character flaw. A twice-divorced coach on the story, the standards, and where to actually meet her.